I was WAY off.

Okay, joking aside, it hasn't even started yet. I'm beginning to suspect that Scotland was a bloody great deal harder than anything I'm going to do here, however, so I should do fine. In the meantime, this isn't anything terribly different than normal life. It's nothing tremendously special; it's just the next move in the chess game of life.

I passively considered slicking back my hair this morning, since it's been pretty lifeless anyway and I might as well put it somewhere instead of letting it look all hacked-up and wonky. I figure being all unshaven and scottish pretty much covers the bases, though. I'm not all that bad anyway - it's false advertising. ^.-

Savage has been a dear friend of mine through this whole adjustment process. Or it would have been, if that weren't total bollocks, sorry. I've barely even got it out to play with it at all. I played guitar far more than that. It's terrible. Shameless, too. A transparent attempt to curry favor from a certain butterfly-winged reader just by mentioning the greatest gift she ever gave me.

You can totally contact-juggle with it, so long as you're well-armoured and there's nothing breakable within bounce distance.

Is contact-juggling hyphenated? I wouldn't know. Oh well. I have duct tape, and I shall soon be getting a Stitch plushie. Buy popcorn and you can buy Stitch Plushie! Word!

I also love Ethernet. I should mention this. I want to have it's babies.

But Duct Tape! I love it too. It's so wicked-keen. Ghetto auto body tool, Handyman's Secret Weapon, and cheap wallpaper. ^.^

I wonder if I've got too many blades in here. Hmm. Two pairs of scissors, pocket knife with two blades, two sharp things and scissors, nail clippers (the local police will lock you up for having those, by golly gee!!)...hmm. I should get some razors, utility knives, and an exacto knife, just to round it off.

And now, I shall put up a survey that two people actually answered (much to my amusement - I LOVE seeing how other people see me, 'cause I can never tell how I come across. Sometimes it's jolly funny. ^.^). Only this time, I'll answer it for myself. *splits Ryoko-style*

DO YOU THINK I'M...
1. Quiet or Loud?: Both.  You traverse the spectrum.  You're usually very quiet and unassuming, though.
2. Short or Tall?: Tall.  Not as tall as SOME people, but then, you'd probably rather be shorter than some and taller than most.  You generally hunch, but I think that's mostly because you like to pretend to be shorter than you are.  You think it makes you quicker.  You're quick enough standing tall.
3. Weird or Original?: I still don't understand this question.  Weird and Original are the same thing.  Weird is doing something different and unusual, usually a departure from conformity...which is, by definition, Original behavior, in that you started it.  So you're both, in massive quantities.  Sometimes I get the impression you do it just because you can't stand to be normal...then it gets a bit stale.
4. Nice or Mean?: You're nice to the point where it's a personal detriment.  Remember last night, when your roomie was blasting telly?  Until midnight?  Okay, yeah, you enjoyed it, but still.  Hearing is lovely too.
5. Friendly or Shy?: You're very shy, but if people approach you first, you can be terribly friendly.  You're also very polite, and that's...a KIND...of friendly...
6. Normal or Special?: You're *special.*  As Church Lady would say.
7. Smart or Stupid?: You like to pretend you're stupid just so that people won't think you have an ego, because you can't stand people who are full of themselves.  Playing so many double, triple, and quadruple snares, you MUST be smart.  Or mad.  Come to think of it, stupid people would just come out and say 'Would you be my friend?' and probably have a better job of it.  I wonder who's really the smart one?
8. Boring or Fun?: You're a great deal of fun when you just forget about yourself and play around.  You're very witty and have an excellent sense of humor.
9. Attractive or Unattractive?: Again, you like to think you're unattractive because you can't stand those ego maniacs.  You're cute to some people, though, obviously.
10. Dumb or Dumber?: Dumber, but only because you play the part.
11. Apples or Oranges?: Kumquat/crabapple fruit salad.  But size isn't important...
12. Tekwar or I Am Spock?:  I Am Spock.  You were so quick to renounce the problems of the past, and yet, in doing so, you alienate yourself from people who used to like you for the person you used to be.  You're starting to come to peace with that person from now on, though, and you're better for it, because you really have to be yourself.  In short, your journey is not exploring a new world; it is coming to terms with your old one.
13. Introverted or Extroverted?: ...Bum.
14. Innie or Outie?: I'm only answering because I've seen it - innie.
15. Boxers or Briefs?: Both.  Sometimes everything is where it belongs, and sometimes you just let it all hang out.
16. Regular or Diet?: Diet, but only 'cause you've got a history of wreaking subtle havoc with people who enjoy you for extended periods of time.
17. Insane or Outsane?: Midsane.
18. Half-Full or Half-Empty?: The Ayrn is Half Full.
19. Dedicated or Half-Ass?: You're like to pretend you're dedicated, and you certainly can be, but most of the time you can't be bothered.  ^.-
20. Half-Ass-Full or Half-Ass-Empty?: Half-Ass-Full is it, then.
21. Annoying or Annoying?: Repetitive.
22. Smelly or Stinky?: 'Nonsense, you've got an enchanting musk.' - Mr. Smithers
23. Furry or Hairy?: Furry.  You're going as a Catboy to Nan Desu Kan, aren't you?
24. Dry or Wet?: You're not often wet, and you've got a sort of dry wit about you sometimes, so I'd have to opt for the dehydrated set of affairs.
25. Yes or No?: Yes.
26. or ?: .
27. Perverted or Detrevrep? You know, I used to think you were pretty damn perverted, but now I've seen what people can be capable of, you're practically a prude.  And you always will be a closet prude.  All the sex jokes are a cover for the fact that you're really uncomfortable with the whole concept.
AM I...
1. A psycho?: Yes!  Norman Bates, Michael Ellis, Freddie Kruger, Jason, JUST CALL YOU RAMSES NIBLICK THE THIRD KERPLUNK KERPLUNK WHOOPS!  Where's my thribble?
2. Athletic?: More so than everyone else thinks.  I CANNOT believe nobody thinks you're athletic.  Just because I'm...online...all the time...Ohhhhh.
3. A nerd?: Not really.  You can use computers, you can diagnose your own, but this is because you've got a special rapport with your tools, and your computer is rather special.  You've not got the self-confidence to breach full frontal nerdity...but after a Comp Sci Major... ^.-
4. Funny?: Very.  Sometimes you try a bit hard, though.  Just let it go.
5. Ghetto?: You secretly believe the saddest thing on the earth is a little white boy of suburban descent who wishes he was black...like certain people who blast comedy... ^.-
6. Stupid?: I think you put that on just to mask your true nature.  After all, if you're an idiot savant, you get a lot more attention than if you're a bloody lazy philosopher.  You don't have to try so hard, eh?
7. Two-faced?: You look after yourself primarily, and you need to learn how to look after others a bit more.  It's so hard, though, isn't it?  People don't do what you want them to.  ^.-
8. Obnoxious?: When you go about making people uncomfortable with sex just to keep yourself out of the line of fire, or if you're busy self-depreciating...face it, you're a pain in the ass.
9. Interesting?: More than you know.  You don't need anything at all to make you who you are - no clothes, no cuisine, no gimmicks...you can just be you in any situation you have to be.  The other stuff is just so people will remember you.  ^.-
10. Cool?: Of course!  You're so laid-back, you're horizontal.  Hell, you're almost a right-angle with the rays formed by your body halves protruding in the negative spectrums!  Except when you wax geometric.
11. Retarded?: You're slightly dyslexic and have trouble communicating, but I think that's just 'cause you haven't got much practice.
12. Useful?: Of course you are.  You're good for hitting.  ^.-
13. Multi-functioned?: Oh yeah.  A veritable Swiss Army knife.
14. On fire?: Weird Al would notice that about you.
15. A safe distance away?: Of course.  You're not really dangerous.  You're just a big kitty plushie.
16. Effectively guarded from gamma-level radiation?: You're gonna burn, wee man...
17. In the middle of a desperate search for enlightenment that takes me through a series of desperate clinging attempts at the world view I used to hold until I finally lose all shadows of false perception that used to cloud my mind through process of elimination and will function on a level far beyond that of normal corporeal beings which have never traversed the mighty stormy seas of desire to arrive at Cape Nirvana, Maryland?: Yes.
18. Talking bollocks?: Definitely detecting signs of testicular vocalization!
JUST SOME QUESTIONS
1. What do you think I'll be when I grow up?: Older.
2. Do you think I'll get married?: Maybe not.  You'd love a ceremony, though, something really sappy.
3. When is my birthday?: March 11th, 1984.
4. Where was I born?: Iowa.  I only work in space.
5. How old am I?: 18 years old.  You're too used to being older than you are.
6. Who is my best friend?: I think you really make everyone your best friend.  You truly care about people, even if you're terribly forgetful.
7. What song (if any) reminds you of me?: Fish Heads.
8. Do I remind you of any characters on TV?: Of course, you rip them all off constantly.  XD
9. If you could rename me...what would my name be?: Arthur or Alexander.  And you ARE going to change your name to MacGregor...
10. Have you ever had a dream about me?: All the time.  ^.-
11. Do you think I'm a virgin?: No, not really.
12. REALLY? O.o : ...Yes.  But you have a ways to go before you really learn to trust someone, and until then, I think you're emotionally frigid.
13. If you just met me how old would you guess I am?: Twenty-something.  You tend to be a bit withdrawn and introspective, that makes people think you're a bit...older.  Mysterious.
14. Am I huggable?: Not terribly.  You're quite akward and smell funny.  ^.-
15. If you could give me anything...what would it be?: Money.  It's the root of all evil and the tool of all positive construction.
16. If you could promise me anything..what would it be?: That you'd find that special person you've made up in your head, and she'll actually be interested in you.
17. If you couldn't give me anything...what would you do?: Feel bad about it, probably, but I'd come up with a poem or such.
18. If you couldn't promise me anything...what would you steal from me before you run away like all the other people in my life who wanted my train set, my glorious little train set, the treasure of my life, until that bitch goddess waltzed away with my lovely train set never to return with it again, even though I was only two years old, two YEARS OLD!: I should note that, when I added this question, I was just trying to elicit a nervous laugh response.  I'm not really crazy.  Beep.
19. If you could escape, where would you run?: I wouldn't run.  I would stay right where I am.  You'd never find me.
PERSONAL
1. Am I physically ass, ugly, average, decent, good-looking, beautiful, hot etc?: You want to believe you're hot, but you have some working out to do, bubba.  ^.-  All the same, you've got a sort of charm about you.
2. Would you ever kiss me?: I'd find that difficult.
3. Have you ever considered asking me out?: We've been out many times!
4. Do you ever think about me off-line?: Yes, and I'm not an egomaniac.  ;P
5. If we spent a day together...where would we go and what would we do?: We spend EVERY day together... O.o
6. If you could describe me in one word..what would that word be?: Insecure.
7. Do you/have you ever had a crush on me?: I'm not narcissistic either.  ;P
8. When we first met what were your thoughts?: I don't remember, sorry.  Probably something like, 'Oh no, not again.'
9. If you had to describe to someone who I am and what I am like what would you tell them?: You're really clever and witty, but you tend to seem distracted.  Don't worry, you really ARE paying attention to them, even if it seems like you're divided.  You just don't like looking folks in the eye.
10. What if I said the same thing about you?: You did.
11. Not so funny now, is it?: It's just confusing, really...
12. Would you lend me a fiver?: I often do.  You never pay me back, though.
**EVERYBODY**
1. Do you wish we were closer?: We're as close as we're ever going to get.  O.o
2. State here your completely honest opinion of me: You're insecure and very lonely...but you don't have to be.  Just let it be and appreciate yourself for who you are.
3. If you want my body and you think I'm sexy come on baby let me know: Eh, I suppose you're sexy-ish...
4. Is this the real life, is this just fantasy?: I see a little silhouetto of a man.  Skalamoosh, Skalamoosh, do you do the fandango?
5. Will you still love me tommorrow?: You don't know any more of that song, do you?
6. Did Ayrn just rip those off from songs, or does he really want to know?: You agonized over it for a good half an hour, pulling everything you could from your mental database just so anyone who'd answer your survey would be pleasantly surprised instead of having to deal with the same survey everyone else is looking at.  I don't think you even cared what people said, so long as they enjoyed the novelty.
7. Is Ayrn really as sad, lonely and insecure as he seems?: Not really.  I think some of it is a front, 'cause you're hoping someone will bring you out of yourself someday, if you look vulnerable enough.  Works for some people, eh?  And they ACTIVELY turn people away.
8. Is this survey proof?: Yes.

I think there's a lesson in that for all of us. ^.-